10 Years.. of INNER PEACE

Early morning yoga and meditation for me. My morning routine I started years ago changed my life. I thought back today.... My past being full of beautiful life lessons 

The HURT and dis-ease continues to thrive and survive because someone is unwilling to end the altercation. That person may be you. Maybe not, but YOU are the one you need to be concerned about.

I’m coming up on the 10 year anniversary of the day I found myself in my doctors office leaving with a bottle of antidepressants and sleeping pills.

Coming to grips of being a single mom with a 4 month old was a lot. Stress, and situational depression set in, and I found myself struggling. Finances were in the negative and I was down at below ground zero.

Deep down I knew I’d be okay, but that took many years to get back on my feet. Many HARD years. Many dark days.

I was resentful. I was mad. I was pissed. I remember punching a hole in the wall. I yelled and screamed a lot. I cried a lot. I was...

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What Matters Most

8 years ago. My baby boy. Don’t you think Elliott looks like Easton? I do.

Jeans : 50 cents.. USED…at a Mommy sale.
Onesie and Hat: $2 - Dollarama

The first year I was a single mom. The first Christmas I was alone. $2.50 to dress my little guy and he’s perfect!

TODAY… In a world full of matching “perfect outfits”, conspicuous consumption, and “happy perfect”, I simply want to remind you of something this holiday season.

It doesn’t matter how “perfect” your outfits were, if they even matched or how much you spent on them. Me.. I still think I win every time I dress my kids for under $5 or buy second hand.... This mama still refuses to get caught up in buying THINGS... or getting sucked in to keeping up with the Jones’.

What matters?? LOVE. Memories. LIVING LIFE.. and not faking perfect.

Promise....You’ll look back on the hard seasons of life and remember you MADE IT. That it wasn’t always happy and...
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Lead the Way

I asked him today..Do you remember when you were 4 and had a major meltdown over a superman shirt and we were almost late for your first day of kindergarten? No.

I asked him..Do you think Aria will remember her meltdowns at this age too? He said No.

Then a Taylor Swift song came on. He asked questions. At age 14 she moved to Nashville to pursue her dream of singing. She went for it despite failure, judgement, and fears, she followed her heart. She had a dream and she went for it. She wanted more, and she went for it.

I then told my son this: 
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All I wish for you is that you are happy, and healthy. Don’t you EVER let anyone tell you that you can’t do something, and if you have a dream, you go for it! You must BELIEVE in yourself. You must follow your heart.
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If there’s ONE conversation he remembers. I hope it was this one. I think at 9, he will.
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The only wish I have for my children is that they simply go after the kind of life that makes them happy. That they are...

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Happily Ever After

As a little girl did you ever read those books where you get to choose the path and pick a different ending? I loved those books.

Today is a pretty big anniversary day. We are approaching 3 years of marriage soon.... but this day is the one year anniversary of the day Dennis officially put in his notice, and we became a full-time family thanks to my coaching/online influencer business.

We’ve been a full time family since we had Elliott 19 months ago 

In my story. The first path I chose was also love filled. But as it turned out, it wasn’t the path where I lived happily ever after.

Love. Career. House. Marriage. Baby. Divorce. Single Parenting. Struggle. Loss. Heartache. Hurt. Capped Salary. Limited Vacation time. Stress leaves. Existence really.

I cringe at the fact that I almost NEVER chose this second path. I almost never chose it for fear. For uncertainty. For doubt. For insecurity. For not feeling worthy enough or smart enough.

I almost never started dating...

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Self Love First

My ex husband used to call me the Dream Killer. Kind of ironic that my career today, is to mentor women on how to chase their dreams, and get healthy and fulfilled. Still cracks me up.

Lindsay... The DK. Dream Killer.

After my ex-husband passed away, I opened our wedding time capsule, cause surely we didn't make it 25 years. My heart sank. His prediction of where we would be in 25 years... Divorced.

I knew it too actually if I'm being honest.

His reasoning... NOTHING was ever good enough for me, and he was right. To this day, Jeff was one of my greatest teachers. He's a huge part of my WHY. An amazing guy, who taught me many life lessons.

Self Love. I often thought that I'd be happy if I lost another 10 pounds. A cat you say? I got two. I hate cats. Maybe more money will make me happy. Better job title? Got that too.

A new car? Check. Vacation? Charge it. It was a constant desperate attempt to get MORE MORE MORE.

One day I decided that I was exhausted. Tired. Miserable. Cynical,...

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Love is the Answer

Slow down mama.... Easier said than done some days..

I remember when I was a single mom..

Seeing those types of posts made me feel like a big sac of crap.

Then came the ones where if you had a clean house...it insinuated you spent less time with your kids... or a messy house meant you were lazy...and should be doing more.

Or how breast was “best”, and so on... and so forth. The homemade baby food...the swimming classes...and finger painting...the baby wearing...the co-sleeping...the fancy birthday parities.... or working moms vs. Stay at home moms...

One could go mental and feel so unworthy trying to keep up.

What I have learned over the years is this:

Trying to compare our lives to everyone’s highlights is exhausting. The judgments, the criticism, the high demands and expectations and motherhood is tough, and parenting is hard.

As I sat here with Elliott this morning, my eyes flooded with tears, and my heart hurt with LOVE.... There is absolutely NO question about...

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"You get in life what you have the courage to ask for" ~ Oprah Winfrey