Jogging Suits and Sneakers.. Minus the Jogging.

There comes a moment in time where you choose yourself, and showing up as your real self, takes some time to adjust.  It feels weird, it feels different, it feels like a tug of war going on inside until you simply decide to stay rooted in your truth.

There comes a point in your life where being someone you're not becomes more difficult than being who you really are.  This is where you decide that what you have been doing is no longer serving you and you walk away.  Knowing when to quit something is a power move and sometimes walking away is the absolute best thing you can do for yourself, your health, and your family.  It's a homecoming and a return to true unconditional love.  It's finding something you love, and then spending your days doing what you love and being in love.  Your life then becomes a dance of going back and forth of doing and being and you're in a state of extreme flow and inner bliss.

If you're not doing what you're meant to do, then you're uneasy, tense, frustrated, annoyed, and bored.  If you're doing things for others, and not for yourself, well this will only lead to pain, failure, and frustration. I've come to know this over the years that sometimes it takes doing a lot of the wrong things in order to get to the point where you can do the right things.  It takes a lot of failure and trying a lot of things that do not work before you can reach success.

Those right things are felt in your heart and sometimes uncovering those things can be a little difficult for life sometimes forces you to sit alone with yourself without the outside world of distraction.   I've been in this place many times and while it can be very painful place to stay in, it's also a birthing place for your inner most desires and dreams to come to life. 

It's easy to get caught up in the doing what everyone else is doing.  It's easy to feel like you're not stacking up against others. It's easy to just blend in, do as you are told, and to be like everyone else.  But what if being happy requires you staying true to yourself regardless of how it looks to others?  In fact, this is the whole point of life.  Finding yourself, being yourself, loving yourself, and accepting yourself.

I can tell you over the years I've done a lot of things and usually while I was doing those things there was a little war going on inside.  A negative part of me that was pissed off, annoyed, frustrated, or just angry for some "unknown" reason.  I now know that I wasn't listening to myself and of course she had every right to be angry and pissed off.  I was doing things the deeper I didn't want to do.  

I've worked a lot of jobs and I've thought certain things would make me happy.  Turns out the happiness was only temporary until I found the one thing that could make me the most happiest.  That was finding my true self and cultivating a deep and loving relationship with God.  When you have that, you really don't need anything else for you've got everything and you know that you are everything that you see because you're the creator of your own life experience.  Living a spiritual life is a wild journey and it's not all love and light all the time.  There has to be both the darkness and the light for us to function, but learning how to live in inner harmony is key.  Learning how to overcome fear and have faith instead is essential.

Sometimes not knowing what you want to do with your life is the most painful place to be. This is because you're a human being.. Not a human doing and finding out who you're meant to be is key.  I sat for a very long time somewhat bored, and not knowing what to do with my life for many years.  This dark night of the soul can be an excruciating space for a lot of people because their entire belief systems come crashing down.  They are forced to sit with themselves and truly face everything.  What they once loved and found meaning in soon becomes meaningless and yes, it can be very depressing and lonely, but once you let go and let life do it's thing through you, you come to the place of divine trust and belief that whatever is happening is happening for your highest good and that it needs to happen.  You simply need to relax and let whatever is meant to come to the surface RISE to the surface.

You could try to resist it, but that will only cause you pain.  You can try to run from it, but that will only lead you to do a million other things that won't work.  You can try to stay busy, but you'll just prolong the suffering. Or, you can just sit there and learn to be who you really are without trying to be anyone else.  Why is this so difficult?  Well... We've been conditioned to believe that our worth and success comes from hard work, doing and earning, when in fact our worth is not tied to anything external.   We've been taught to believe that our identity lies in our work, our our business, or or job title, when in fact our real identity rests in something so much deeper.

I had been fighting myself most of my life.  I had been running from myself and guess what?  Sooner or later it just becomes easier to just be who you are instead of trying to be someone you're not.  Imagine how exhausting that would be for someone?  Always trying to be better than you already are at your core.  Always trying to be different than who God created you to be.  Real transformation isn't about being someone different, or aiming to be someone better.  Real transformation is coming home to yourself and a remembering.  It's like peeling all the layers away and removing what's not really you, so you can get to the really good stuff that's been there this whole time.  

What do you mean you want to wear jogging suits, sneakers, write every day and just travel the world? 

You need a real job with benefits, and a pension plan.  You should be wearing a suit, heels, have an office, and work your regular hours every day.  What do you mean you want to only work when you want to work, sleep when you want to sleep, and do what you want to do when you want to do it?  What do you mean you don't want to be on social media, you don't watch the news and you're not into politics?  Everyone has to be on social media, and you should be too.  What do you mean you hate exercising and you love eating bagels and big macs?  You need to be prioritizing your protein and getting your 10K steps in with a weighted vest and taking your probiotics.  You see... the world is full of people who like to tell you what is right and best for you, and if you're not careful you can lose yourself just listening to others.  

The cool thing about creating a life that YOU love is that it's up to you to create it and other peoples opinions or judgements don't hold any weight when it comes to manifesting what you really want for your life.  The only person that needs to be fully on board is you.  The other cool thing about creating a life by your own design is that it's yours to design.  Knowing you are in full control allows you to step into the powerful position of being the boss of your own life.

You want to eat bagels and cream cheese for breakfast and spend 5 hours in the evening painting and selling your art?  Go for it.

You want to wear a pencil shirt, 5 inch heels, and go to work for 8 hours a day, give presentations, and update spreadsheets?  Go for it if that's a lifestyle that turns you on.

You want to buy a mini van, raise your babies, spend your days doing laundry, organizing closets or making your home look perfect all while sharing your tips or chore charts on Pinterest.  Go for it.

You want to walk dogs and and snuggle puppies all day.  Do that.  

You want to move to the country, raise chickens, sell your eggs, bake peach pies, plant a veggie garden, and enjoy the land.  Absolutely.

You want to work in a factory, commute 2 hours a day, come home to your dogs, drink beer, and build a deck on the weekend.  You go nuts.

You want to sing and dance and be famous?  Absolutely.

You want to teach young kids how to play the flute?  Amazing.

You want to plant a fairy garden, paint a wall, read more books, eat takeout every damn day, or sit around and watch murder mysteries while eating Doritos and chicken dip.  Go nuts and enjoy!

You want to paint rocks, do stained glass, or knit socks in your free time?  I love it.

You want to be a fashion designer and walk on the runway?  Stunning.

You want to wear makeup, go tanning, hit the gym, and post your workouts?  I love that too.

You want your own business teaching people how to salsa dance?  Absolutely.  

You want to work from home, be your own boss, relax, get facials at the spa, meditate, do some yoga or pilates, wear jogging suits, sneakers, listen to country music, do only the things you love to do, and travel to Disney World to explore, ride some rides, make memories with the people you love, and eat chicken nuggets, french fries, delicious mac and cheese accompanied with a glass or red wine and some cheesecake for dessert?  I'm totally in!

You see, the cool thing about designing your life is that it's yours, but first you need to know yourself well enough and connect with your own life force, otherwise you might be doing some things you don't want to do, or feel that you have to and that's going to cause a lot of pain and health problems.

Sometimes we can create the "roles" or characters based on our past traumas and we put ourselves into environments that eventually suck the life from us and that's a real blessing in disguise.  When you're doing the wrong things, you will know and then you can learn what it takes to do the right things and that right thing is just being true to yourself.   In that moment you are more than enough and you're not doing random things in order to be more than you already are.

So today, I am just sitting in my favourite chair, drinking my coffee, feel cozy in my warm pink blanket and putting my heart onto a page for some random person on the internet to read and you know what?  That makes me really happy and like I've done my job here in this world.  It feels like I'm being myself and it doesn't feel like work.  In fact, that's how you will know.  When you are doing what you love to do, you won't ever work a day in your entire life.  Sure, you'll work hard, but it's not that hard.  It's divine flow and when you are flowing with life, your life becomes easy, fun, magical, enjoyable, and you're living your life on purpose. 

So if you're still here, following along, reading my words, supporting my business, thank you for being here. There is a reason our worlds collided and you're in the right place.  Just know that whoever you choose to be or whatever you choose to do, do it with a heart full of love, for there you will find the real treasure and the riches of life.    

Have the most beautiful day!

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Additional Reads:

Wake Up and Live - 101 Days of Deep Inner Work to Transform Your Life

Rise and Shine - 101 Days to a Happier You

Taking Your Personal Power Back - 101 Days of Relentless Action Forward

High Level Leadership - Levelling Up to Meet Your Highest Self