Know the Difference
Oct 21, 2026
Have you ever woken up in the middle of the night, just thinking randomly about things or perhaps other people?
I know I have.
There have been many nights, many days, and many hours when I’ve dedicated my time and energy to thinking, worrying, or stressing about someone else.
And I’d encourage you to ask yourself this one question today:
How much of your time, attention, and energy have you spent on yourself?
I mean, have you really even thought about that?
I sat there thinking about all the emotional energy I freely gave to other people, often at my own expense.
And perhaps that’s why, as women, we get older and become exhausted, or adopt the mentality that we just don’t give a fuck anymore.
But I don’t think that’s necessarily true.
I think we do give a fuck, and that’s what sometimes comes back to bite us in the end.
We care deeply.
We love unconditionally.
We show up.
We give to others.
We forgive easily.
And then one day, we finally say to ourselves, “I matter too,” and “I deserve time, love, focus, energy, and attention.”
And that’s when we truly reclaim our lives.
When we reclaim our power.
When we reclaim our energy.
It’s when we call back the energy we so freely gave to others and invest it back into ourselves.
Into our own lives.
Into our own family.
Into our own homes.
Into our own relationships.
Into our own dreams.
Into our own goals.
Into our own vision.
Now, I’m not saying to become self-absorbed and think only about yourself.
That’s not what I’m saying at all.
What I am saying is that we have to be wise enough, from here on out, to know who and what gets our attention.
We have to face reality and see people for who they truly are, not who we want them to be or who they could be once they discover their own potentional.
We have to trust that people show us who they are through their actions, not just through what they say.
And above all else, we have to listen to our own heart when it whispers to us not to spend any more time or energy on someone who likely never deserved our time and energy in the first place.
What I’ve learned is that relationships require a 50/50 effort.
If you’re the one putting in 100% of the effort and getting nothing in return, then that’s when you need to pull back and put that same effort into yourself.
The absolute best thing you can do is make the most of yourself, for yourself, and that’s literally impossible to do when you’re not giving 100% to yourself first and foremost.
When you’re operating from a full, wholesome space, you discover who you have room for and who you don’t.
Oftentimes, when we’re depleted or empty, we give just about anyone access to our time, energy, and attention. But that never works out to our advantage.
In fact, we just end up becoming even more depleted, more resentful, and more bitter.
But when you’re at 100%, you realize you didn’t need that many people in the first place and that only a select few deserve access to you.
And that’s not rude, selfish, arrogant, or bitchy.
That’s powerful, confident, and worthy.
Know the difference.
Author: Lindsay Rose Martin, Spiritual Medium
Discover spiritual guidance, messages from Spirit, and a deeper sense of inner peace.
Lindsay Rose Martin is a spiritual medium, author, and spiritual teacher who helps people explore their connection with Spirit, deepen their understanding of themselves, and create lives rooted in greater peace, joy, purpose, and personal freedom.
Through channeled messages from Spirit, thought-provoking spiritual writing, and transformational programs, Lindsay invites you to reconnect with your inner wisdom, release what no longer serves you, and discover a more peaceful and fulfilling way to live.
Whether you're seeking spiritual insight, navigating a personal transformation, or ready to deepen your spiritual journey, you'll find inspiration, guidance, and opportunities to grow.
