My WHY
Apr 14, 2019
Sunday Cardio is about to go down. Spotify playlist goes on. Shoes on. Hair up. Then I press play for 30 minutes.
What is your WHY? What is your motivation for a better life? Getting clear on this will be the big game changer.
MY WHY. It’s been a while since I’ve shared it. Not after skinny. Not after abs. I’m after Health. Happiness. Fulfilment.
It’s been 8 years since I was 11 minutes too late arriving to the hospital. September 10, 2011. He died at 11:04am.
I still remember the smell of his hair when I kissed his forehead. He was gone. I was 11 minutes too late, and I remember walking into the hospital. I knew. He died of massive heart failure from an inoperable tumour in his heart.
He was 35. He turned 35 in the hospital 9 days before he passed away. He was too sick to eat his favourite cheesecake.
2 weeks from the date of diagnosis of cancer that filled his entire body, until the day I picked up this tomb stone that said loving father on it.
It’s been 8 years since we lost him. We were divorced at the time. He was one of my very best friends. Still committed as parents.
I remember sitting on the side of his hospital bed about to discuss last wishes. But there was no time. So many people around. No time to ask the questions. No time. I thought he’d be okay. I thought he’d make it. I thought he’d get better.
He didn’t. All this man cared about was that our son was given the BEST life possible. That our son was taken care of. That he was given the BEST life.
Sadly after that day on the side of his hospital bed. I continued to exist. Caught up in grief. The PAST. Victimhood. Struggles. Stress. Blame.
Anger. Mediocrity. For nearly 3 YEARS I neglected my wellbeing. My health. I showed up to my life half ass.
Then I found a bigger WHY. A promise that I made to a man that now looks down from heaven.
This life is a gift. This health is a gift. This body is a gift. I best HONOUR those gifts 🎁
I’m the ONLY mom my kids have, and in order for THEM to have the best life, THIS MOMMA needs to put her damn oxygen mask on first.
So I’ve been showing up to my life EVERY DAMN DAY for 4 years now, and not a day goes by where I’m not GRATEFUL. That deep pain and grief, and loss taught me THE MOST valuable life lesson.
We either get busy LIVING, before it’s too fucking late!… and OUR HEATH is the most precious asset we have.
Not money. Not titles. Not bigger homes. LIFE. Health. Memories. LOVE.
What’s my WHY? To LIVE THE SHIT out of my LIFE. To not just EXIST but to LIVE, and then I’m gonna INSPIRE other women to do the same and help them every damn day!
I ain’t going anywhere friends. If you’re tired of my selfies.... Good. Tired of hating on and rolling your eyes? Tired of struggling and being exhausted and unhealthy? Tired of existing?
.
Why not ask me what I’m doing. Why I’m so healthy. Why I’m never sick. Why I’m so energized. Why I’m so happy! You know you wanna!
You only live once they say. WRONG. You live EVERY DAY. You only DIE once.
What’s your why? My best advice. Find a good one much better than “looking good”.
Find Your Joy Again!
If you spend time on social media, you may have found yourself comparing your own life to your friends, family, total strangers, and celebrities.
You might find yourself feeling less than, struggling with feelings of unworthiness and your confidence, and health can be in the gutter.
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